Reality In It's Finest
by bella ya its my name
Summary: I'm Bella Swan B-swan to some I'm a country singer. My life is well my life I think everyone can understand that. And I have a perfect boyfriend whose perfect.Plus his family is O-mazing. Have I mentioned they're not human. D. NO cussing nor lemons
1. Life, Fight and Songs

_**My Life**_

**Okay so I know I haven't added a chapter to my other story, but don't worry I'm still continuing with that story. I just sat at my dad's computer (his doesn't have my other story on it) and started writing I fell in love with what I wrote and wanted to show you. ~ Love Ya~**

This time was my time. I wasn't going to let him go not so easily at least. I loved him and I knew he loved me he told me over and over again. Now he was walking away from me looking hurt. I need to sing that song tomorrow and hope he listens.

"Alice 105.9 tomorrow 8:30am listen." I yield. All he did to egnalige that he heard me was one small stiff nod. What does that mean? Is he going to listen? Oh I hope he does.

Let me review for you I'm Bella Swan and in my small town named Forks I was the closes thing we had to famous I was a country singer(all songs are Taylor Swift songs), but I didn't want to be famous to everyone else not yet. I had just written a new song and the radio station (the most popular radio station in Forks) wanted me to go on at 8:30am answer some questions and sing the newest song I had.

My life was good but tonight I had a huge blow up with perfect boyfriend Edward Cullen. I was sure I was in love with. It was our first fight and I still wasn't sure what happened. Did we break up no we couldn't I need him to much he was my life. I think the fight started with him not wanting me to lose my soul to become what he was.

When I slammed the door the first thing I heard was my dad (Charlie) snoring. I shed a million tears on my way to my room. I sat down and wrote two songs. I loved them I think they put things between Edward and I beautifully.

I finally fell asleep thinking of Edward's lullaby. Well I usually call it my lullaby but senses I didn't know if he belonged to me I didn't know if this still belonged to me.

It was 6am and Alice (Edward's little sister) just came over to do my hair and makeup.

"Alice," I complained as she dragged me out of bed." It doesn't matter what I look like only a few people are going to see me."

"Bella something is going to happen after the show thing….," she trailed off not knowing what to call it." I want you to be presentable for it."

I ground.

"Bella come on me saw it in a vision. Don't you trust me?"

"With my life." I said with a tint of sarcasm.

"Good now get in the shower." She thrust a towel in my arms and shoved my through the door.

I took a long shower until I ran out of hot water. Then stagger slowly to my room afraid of what I would find. Alice was standing next to a chair that she put right next to my full length mirror that I never really noticed. She also moved my bed side table and covered it with hair products along with a million things of makeup. This couldn't be good this couldn't be good at all. Was all I could think at that moment.

" Go change into this." She forced an outfit in to my arms. It was black leggings, a beautiful skirt and a black and blue shirt. When I came back out she forced me to put on these beautiful black and gold earrings a big black and gold ring and some pock a dot flats. She put a little make up on me and then she was done.

" Alice this is too much." I had to say. It was all to stunning for me.

" Bella you look great and it's just the thing for what's happening today." She smiled and bounced up and down while clapping her hands pretty fast for me at least." Now get in my car and I'll drive you there."

"fine." I gave up. I grabbed my guitar and headed for her yellow Porsche that Edward had gotten her as a gift.

We were at the station's building in ten minutes. Mainly because of Alice's insane speeding. They took me to the studio were Slacker and Steve were on. The saw me at once and started to announce me. That's when the producer told me to go in.

" Yih Bella." They said at once.

"Yih guys."

"Hey thanks for coming." Slacker began.

"No thank you for having me."

"Anytime so…. We heard that you would perform a new song for us live." Steve finished.

" Uh ya well actually I have two new sings that I just wrote if that's okay." I hinted my concern.

" Oh no that's perfect, but when you say you just wrote what do you mean?" Steve commented.

I laughed slightly at how he said that," I mean I just wrote them last night after something huge happened to me that left me a little confused."

" What happened? Bswan come on spill to your best guy friends." Slacker said in such a girly way that it made me laugh.

" Well see my boyfriend and I had our first fight ever… and I was and still am a little confused on were that left us. Ya know."

" Yes I know Steve and I get into fights all the time." Once again being girly.

" Well that's because I don't like you……………………….and I'm married." Steve said joking around a little. I laughed my head off at that one.

" Okay the first song is The Other Side of the Door and some of it is about him some isn't. Mostly the good parts and the throwing rocks and stuff like that is about him."

" Wait throwing stuff…." Slacker trailed off with a questioning tone.

" Ya'll just have to wait and find out for yourselfs."

I began strumin' my guitar to the beat in my head.

_The Other Side Of The Door Lyrics_

In the heat of the fight;  
I walked away.  
Ignoring words that you were saying,  
Tryna make me stay.  
I said, "This time I had enough."  
And you've called a hundred times,  
But I'm not pickin' up.  
'Cause I'm so mad, I might tell you that it's over.  
But if you look a little closer

I said, "Leave," but all I really want is you  
To stand outside my window, throwing pebbles; screaming, "I'm in love with you."  
Wait there in the pourin' rain,  
Come back for more.  
And don't you leave,  
'cause I know all I need  
is on the other side of the door.

Me and my stupid pride  
Sittin' here, alone.  
Going through the photographs,  
Staring at the phone.  
I keep going back over  
The things we both said.  
And I remember the slammin' door,  
And all the things that I misread.  
So baby you know everything,  
Tell me why you couldn't see  
That when I left I wanted you to  
Chase after me?

I said, "Leave," but all I really want is you  
To stand outside my window, throwing pebbles; screaming, "I'm in love with you."  
Wait there in the pourin' rain,  
Come back for more.  
And don't you leave,  
'cause I know all I need  
is on the other side of the door.

And I scream out the window,  
"I can't even look at you, I don't need you,"  
But I do, I do, I do.  
I say, "there's nothing you can say  
To make this right again, I mean it,  
I mean it"  
What I mean is

I said, "Leave," baby all I want is you  
To stand outside my window, throwing pebbles; screaming, "I'm in love with you."  
Wait there in the pourin' rain,  
Come back for more.  
And don't you leave,  
'cause I know all I need  
is on the other side of the door.

With your face, and your beautiful eyes,  
And the conversation,  
With the little white lies.  
And the faded picture  
Of a beautiful night  
You carry me from your car  
up the stairs  
And I'm broke-down cryin'  
Was she worth this mess?,  
After everything in that little black dress  
After everything, I must confess,  
I need you 

**Steve pressed a button that made it sound that a crowd was clapping." That was beautiful."**

"**Do you understand the throwing stuff now."**

" **Yes."**

" **Okay this next song is Jump then Fall and is also about him." I moved my shoulders a little to emphasize the "him" a little.**

_Jump Then Fall Lyrics_

I like the way you sound in the morning,  
we're on the phone and without a warning  
I realize your laugh is the best sound I have ever heard

I like the way I can't keep my focus,  
I watch you talk you didn't notice  
I hear the words but all I can think is we should be together

(chorus)  
every time you smile, I smile  
and every time you shine, I'll shine for you

whoa oh I'm feeling you baby  
don't be afraid to jump then fall, jump then fall into me

baby, I'm never gonna leave you,  
say that you wanna be with me too  
cause I'm gonna stay through it all so jump then fall

well I like the way your hair falls in your face  
you got the keys to me I love each freckle on your face, oh,  
I've never been so wrapped up,  
honey, I like the way you're everything I've ever wanted

I had time to think it oh-over and all I can say is come closer,  
take a deep breath and jump then fall into me

(chorus)  
every time you smile, I smile  
and every time you shine, I'll shine for you

whoa oh I'm feeling you baby  
don't be afraid to jump then fall, jump then fall into me

baby, I'm never gonna leave you,  
say that you wanna be with me too  
cause I'm gonna stay through it all so jump then fall

the bottoms gonna drop out from under our feet  
I'll catch you, I'll catch you  
when people say things that bring you to your knees,  
I'll catch you  
the time is gonna come when you're so mad you could cry  
but I'll hold you through the night until you smile

whoa oh I need you baby  
don't be afraid please  
jump then fall, jump then fall into me

baby, I'm never gonna leave you,  
say that you wanna be with me too  
cause I'm gonna through it all so jump then fall

jump then fall baby  
jump then fall into me, into me

every time you smile, I smile  
and every time you shine, I'll shine  
and every time you're here baby, I'll show you, I'll show you  
you can jump then fall, jump then fall, jump then fall into me, into me

yeah

Slacker and Steve clapped away and didn't stop for two whole minutes.

" Thank you I'll remember that moment for the rest of my life." I knew I would that meant so much to me that little thing.

"and your clear." I heard the voice from my headphones say. We all stood and shook hands.

" Thanks again for having me." It just amazes me that they would want me on they're show.

" No, no thank you I hope you deal things out with your boyfriend. He's a lucky guy." Steve said and I blushed red.

" Indeed he is. And may I be the first to say you look astounding today." He commented and I blushed harder.

I walked outside and looked for Alice she was no where to be found." Crap Alice."

" Hello Bella." I heard the voice of an angle call.


	2. I'm Alive

**THANK YOU GabzR for being the first and only person to read and review my story!!!!=D ~LUV YA~**

I'M ALIVE

"Oh Edward," I throw myself at him," I'm so sorry I shouldn't have gotten mad at………….well I was never mad at you just myself."

" Don't you dare apologize you did nothing wrong, Love." He pulled his hand that wasn't around my waist through my hair. Almost as if he was petting me. I didn't mind it felt nice it was converting . Only then did I realize I had been cryin' .

" It's okay, Love." I heard what was that………………….curiosity in his voice.

" Yes Edward is there something you need to ask me?" Now I was curious.

" It's just that when you were on the radio you said something that confused me." He looked almost hurt. It hurt me just to see him like that tryin' to hide the pain that he felt.

" What was it that confused you." I practically demanded.

" Well when you said you were confused on where our first fight left us. What did that mean?" Oh gosh that was something I was hoping he would have possibly not heard.

I took a deep breath then sighed." Well to be honest Edward I didn't know if you still wanted to be with me…" I had to stop I was losing myself.

" Bella you do remember what the argument started about?" he questioned me.

"No, no I really don't like think about it." I said with a frown. He kissed me lightly and my frowned disappeared completely.

"Well it all started this is somewhat not a very good thing to get into an argument over," he almost said to himself," It all started with us arguing over who loves each other the most. Then turned into us discussing how I won't take your soul away so you could be what I am."

"Well that is not something that should've left with a big blow up."I almost smiled knowing that what we fought over was our love for each other.

"agreed." He kissed my cheek. I was happy again.

"If you don't mind me asking?"

"Of course not, love ask me anything." He said with his velvety voice.

"Well are you taking me out cause Alice made me get all dressed up about something that is 'going to happen after the talk show thing'" you could hear the quotes in my voice.

"Of course I am Bella we have to celebrate how well you did on the talk show."

"Ah so we did have it right……sorta." I was over whelmed did he really like the songs?

" Oh and Bella I'll always chase after you and wait outside in the pourin' rain throw pebbles and scream I love you." Oh my gosh he just told he would do all the things I wanted him to do in my song Other Side of the Door. Yes it's true he is perfect he truly was perfect. He noticed things no one else would notice. He loved deep than anyone else could love. He truly cared for me.

"So where are we going." I questioned. I hope he's not spending a lot of money on me I just hate it when he does that. Almost more then when he tells me where we're going is a surprise.

He looked over at me like I should know what his response would be.

I ground.

"Come on Bella what would be the fun if I told you. I wouldn't get to see the way your beautiful face lights up at your amassment."

"The worst part about my life is I cannot learn to hate you when you do something I would normally hate." He only looked at me with a pot.

"Aw poor Bella." He faked his concern flawlessly.

Conversations flowed between us easily the subject was on me a lot of the time so I would quickly change the subject sometimes to him. Suddenly the car came to a swift but gentle halt. The place rang a bell in my memories I knew this place meant something. I didn't know if that something was good or bad but I was memorized by this place. I couldn't take my eyes off this place.

"Edward where are we?" I didn't turn to look at him knowing he was staring as well as I. What was it about this place? I got out of the car not waiting for Edward and I walked. I walked and I walked. It led left then right, straight, left again and again then right three more times (kind of like a maze but only led's one way). I knew all this time that Edward was right behind me smiling at me (I peeked a couple of times). It led to a small place with one bench a guitar, piano and bookshelf. A couple of Ikebana which are Japan flowers. My favorite and he knew it. I told him once after I awoke from a dream (a week ago) that that was my dream place he most have paid attention and designed it from his memory. I twirled in the middle of the best place on planet earth and somehow ended up in the angle's arms.

"Edward what is this place?" I most know it was driving me crazy.

"Don't you recognize it after all it's what you created? It's your dream place, Love. You told me about it a week ago. Esme, Alice and I have been working on it. It was finished yesterday." He whispered into my ear it made me shiver.

"You guys would've had to pay this land to be able to do this." I was sure of that which means he spent money on me, but I couldn't find it in me to be mad at him for it the place was to perfect as if it had came out of one of my dreams. Oh wait it had.

"Are you mad at me." I shook my head in a way of saying no I couldn't speak. He kissed me on my cheek. I ran over to the guitar and picked it up to examine it. It wascherry wood just like the one I told him about that was in my dreams.

"You bought me a new guitar!?!" I screamed. I love this guitar all ready.

"Yes we did your old one was getting a little old." He commented on my other baby.

"Don't be mean to the original. She's been great plus she's the one who will going places. This baby's staying here in my dream world."

He chuckled softly, "is it perfect?" he questioned me.

"Almost." I pulled him to the black grand pianothat was our black grand piano sense he wasn't the only one who could play." Please play my lullaby." I pouted a little. He kissed me then started playing easily not even looking at the keys. I was. I was watching his perfect hands glide across the keys effortlessly. Of course I was not as good as Edward at playing the piano, but I was still great. I looked at a piece of piano that had a Chinese sign 形容詞 on it in Edward's flawless hand writing.

"Edward what does that mean?"I pointed to the piece of paper.

"Beautiful." He said swiftly said.

"Why is it the only thing on the piece of paper."

"Because it reminds me of you." He said amiably.

The rest of the night went smoothly he promised me that we would go back tomorrow. I did my homework from Friday with his help. I then slept over at his house (with Charlie's promotion ) with Alice sense it was Saturday night. I crashed by 12am Alice made me stay up that late.

**That's the end tell me what you think plzzzz. I need to know. Im still smiling upon GabzR =D.**

**~LUV YA'LL~**


	3. WAKING UP ALICE!

**Okay so I have two fans come on I know you guys can do better than that. =D ~LUV YA~**

WAKING UP ALICE!!!!!!!

I was awaken by a small pixie jumping up and down on the bed I was sleeping on.

"Alice!!!!" I almost yelled.

"Alice why don't you ever just let her sleep?" The velvety voice that I love so much said from the doorway. Right when I heard that voice my eye flew magically open. A chuckle slipped from his perfect lips as he came to site next to me.

"Because if I let her sleep we would never have time to shop." That girl was a force of nature," I mean seriously Edward she would wake up at 9 or 8. That's not enough time to shop at all."

"Wait what time is it?" I was almost afraid to ask.

"Only 5 in the morning."

"Alice you kept me up tell 12 am and now you wake me up at5am." Man I was mad." Don't you know that us _humans_ need 7 hours of sleep or at least 5?"

"Silly Bella you got 5 hours of sleep." She was right but that didn't make me any less mad.

"Well than little miss know it all." I leaned into Edward for support and he aromatically wrapped his arms around me." What makes you think I would wanna go shopping with you?" her face looked horror struck.

"Oh please Bella please!" she wined. I got up and started walking down the stairs with Edwards hand in mine.

"Good morning dear." Esme greeted me with a kiss on the cheek.

"Morning and I'm not so sure about the good part." I commented and looked over at Alice who was still begging. She hasn't even token a breath.

"Does Alice want to take you shopping again." She said as she placed food in front of me

"Thank you." I mumbled." And yes she does and she awakened me this early to do so."

" She should know by now that if she wants to take you shop either she wakes you up late or……" she trailed off. Alice was really starting to bug me with all this begging and she knew that.

"Or what?" I need to know what my second mother (or so it seem sense I spend so much time here)was thinking.

She seemed to take a deep breath and then she spoke." Or get Edward to ask you."

"Esme. Gasp!" it was a little joke between the two of us.

"I'm sorry sweetheart you ask and quite frankly I was willing to tell you." Of course everyone thought Edward and I were the cutest couple. What with my blush(that was on my face at this moment) and with Edward making me blush. As I was blushing Edward stroked my cheek. Which only intensified my blush by a lot.

"Esme your genius!!!" Alice screamed. Then she came by Edward and I." Edward please!"

"No Alice I'm not going to make her do anything she does not wish to do." He said stern.

"Make me?" I said heavens know he could make me do anything.

He turned to me with a sly smile on his face." Yes, Love, make." Then I looked over at Alice who smiled like this was her plain all along.

"Oh no!" I knew what she was doing. She was tricking Edward into making me go shopping without knowing it. That's what she wanted all along." I know what you're thinking pixie and I won't let it happen." But it seemed like Edward still wanted to play."Edward stop it!" it sounded like I was a five year old tryin to get her brother to leave her alone.

"Why?" He said with that heavenly pout on his face his perfect bottom lip slightly out.

"Because your sister is a devil-ish pixie who likes to use you agents me." I said once again like a five year old.

He kissed my cheek."Fine but," oh no what was he going to make me do." But you have to admit that I ." he kissed my cheek again." Can make you do anything." Esme laughed knowing that I would give in. Alice clapped her hands together.

" Fine I admit it." I kissed his cheek in response." But I'm still not going shopping with you." I spat at her in a fiery.

"Oh Bellie your no fun." Alice pouted.

"Sorry Alice your pout has no power over me." I looked for Jasper."Unlike it does Jasper."

"Bella." I heard Jasper say and then he was suddenly in the kitchen.

"Oh hi Jasper." I said as if I hadn't said anything about him. He smiled kissed me on the cheek (in a brotherly way) then sat by Alice. Pulled her onto his lap then kissed her.

"Are you gonna try to deny the fact that your Alice's pout has no affect on you what so ever?" Edward questioned with his eyebrow hunched. I loved him when he was playful and teasing especially with his family.

"No I can't deny it. Just like you can't deny the fact that Bella has no power over you 'what so ever'." He quoted Edward. Wait what did he just say that he couldn't deny.

"Your right Jazzy I can't deny it." Edward erupted my train of thought by kissing me on the lips a quick kiss but long enough to make me frazzled. Everyone burst out into laughter at my face and now at my blush." I think she looks cute." Edward add while stroking my cheek.

"Okay okay no more embossing Bella." Carlisle said as he walked in the room

"Thank you." I said and I sounded breathless which only made everyone (this time including Carlisle)laugh," Come on Carlisle I thought you were on my side."

"I was I mean am." He said in between laughs." Sorry Bella you just sound so out of breath as if you ran ten miles."

"Shouldn't you be getting at your boyfriend." Jasper said he had a point. I could tell Edward was shaking his head by my side.

"You know Jazzy you have a point." I looked at Edward from the corner of my eye.

"_Jasper_." Edward hissed. We all heard a big booming laugh and we all turned to watch Emmett and Rosalie come into the room.

"What Eddie scared of your human girlfriend." He emphasized the h in human.

"Don't call me Eddie. And yes yes I am Emmy." He tickled my side which made me scream." But Emmy you must remember she a genius."

"Well nice to know you can all make fun of Bella."I stood up smiled at them all." But Bella should probably get going so you can't make fun of her anymore."

"No Bellie don't go." Emmy, Alice and Edward said except Edward pulled me back down on his lap.

"We promise not to make any more fun of you Bellies." Emmett promised. If Emmett promised then I knew it was going to be kept.

"Okay if you all insist." This time everyone even me laughed.

"We do insist." Esme came and kissed my forehead.

"Now what are we going to talk about mainly all our subjects are about Bella?" Jasper asked.

"I hope they all can make you all laugh as hard as this one." I said very sarcastically.

"Oh they do." Rosalie stopped to laugh." They do. You should probably get mad at Edward for those two." I like her she always tells me who to get mad at.

"OKAY!"

"And yet she's still not getting mad at him."Emmett wined.

I smiled my sly smile." Not yet."I pointed out and everyone ooooooo'd except for Edward who gulped. "Look who's a coward now." I whispered in his ear. While he frowned and replied.

"But I'm your coward." He whispered in my ear intentionally hot.

"You say it like it makes everything better."

"It does for me at least."  
"Knowing you'll be here makes everything better."

"I think it's the other way around."

"Ha well that's because you don't see yourself very clearly."

"Huh looks like another thing we have in common."

This whole we'd been whispering in each other's ears. While everyone disappeared.

"Where did they go?" I questioned.

"Very subtly giving us some privacy, I suppose."

"Well in that case." I said kissed him for a little while then rested my head on his chest and he buried his face in my hair. I didn't know how long we sat like that but what I did know is I never wanted to move . I felt whole in this perfect moment. The feeling seemed to be mutual.


	4. The Letter

**Sorry my dad erased every file on his computer. And that contained my rough draft for my fourth chapter. So here's a brand new one. For those writers out there have you ever been trying to write something but don't know how to word it well that's my problem so please forgive me ENJOY!!!! **

**WHEN IT IS SLANTED IT'S HER THINKING!!!!!!**

**The Letter**

I had to leave shortly after that. I left unwillingly but Charlie demanded it not that he disliked the Cullen's or anything (mainly Edward he thought he was a saint). I was currently sitting at my window bed waiting for night to creep upon us. When night comes and Charlie's asleep Edward comes. I've been away from him for 12hours and 30minutes. He should be here soon Charlie is snoring.

It was 10:45p.m and a school night. My eyes were starting to drop and I fell asleep. But for the first time without Edward.

* * *

I was getting ready in the morning wondering were Edward could have been last night why he didn't come. Usually when he comes after I have fallen asleep he leaves a note, but here I was waiting for** him** to come pick me up. Its five minutes before school I have to drive myself.

I jump in my truck and started towards school. _Would he be there?_ Was the only thought going through my head.

I got to school and saw his shinny Volvo and a sentence that I haven't said in a long time made its way to my mouth."Stupid shinny Volvo owner." I whispered under my breath. There was his Volvo but no him. _WHAT IS UP WITH HIM????_

I made my way slowly to my class still no Edward in site. _This couldn't be good NO I can't think like that_. I just hope I see him after class after all his first class is the classroom right across from mine. I tried to focus all hour long but couldn't as usual my thoughts wondered to the Greek god that I love so much. For the first time they weren't happy thoughts. The hour ended and I fought the erg to cringe. I walked out nervous what would it mean if he wasn't there.

There he was I let out a sigh of relief then when I saw his face I swallow a big breath and I knew that he had seen that. I tried as hard as I could to get the feeling out of me but it was no use. I just realized when he had to walk to me that I had stopped walking.

"Hey." He looked deep into my eyes."Bella, Love, are you alright?"

"depends." I said slowly.

"On?"

I just realized I left my sentence hanging." If you are?"

"Yes I'm fine but I'm sooooooooo sorry about not coming over last night or picking you up this morning." That's it that's all he's going to tell me? No that's not it I'll force it out of him if I have to!

"what happened?" he looked lost." Why couldn't you have come?"

"oh." He looked as though he did not want to tell me." Nothing much really." He started leading me by the hand to my next class. I stop not willing to move not even an inch. He tried to move me.

"No!" he turned to use the full force of his eyes on me. Not this time I care to much for this." Tell me!"

He bent down so his lips were at my ear, "not here Bella."

"Later?" only he knew I was asking him to promise.

"Later." And only I knew that he was promising. What couldn't he tell me here? Was it a vampire thing or a past thing? I hope it's a vampire thing there was something in his past that had a consequence but he didn't tell me what either the problem or the consequence was.

We were at my next class which I had with Edward. This time as we entered the classroom everyone stared and this time it was because he only had his hand on my back, I looked upset and we weren't talking or looking at each other.

This hour did not pass as quickly as I'd wish it to. This hour had fun torturing me. This hour MADE me think of what was going on with him. What could it possibly be? Then the bell rang for my last class before lunch. I stood and walked out with Edward. He stopped right outside.

"Hey I got to go I'll come get you at your next class." He looked sadder. _That's really not good._ He walked off not even a kiss on the cheek. I motioned with my hands behind his back strangling him but I'm sure he saw through someone else's eyes. In the next class I was thinking a notes and lyrics just came to me. And its name is Crazier.

**"Crazier"**

I'd never gone with the wind  
Just let it flow  
Let it take me where it wants to go to  
You open the door  
There's so much more  
I've never seen it before  
I was trying to fly  
But I couldn't find wings  
But you came along and you changed everything

_[Chorus:]_  
You lift my feet off the ground  
You spin me around  
You make me crazier, crazier  
Feels like I'm falling and I am lost in your eyes  
You make me crazier, crazier, crazier

I've watched from a distance as you made life your own  
Every sky was your own kind of blue  
And I wanted to know how that would feel  
And you made it so real  
You showed me something that I couldn't see  
You opened my eyes  
And you made me believe

_[Chorus]_

Baby you showed me what living is for  
I don't wanna hide anymore  
Oh oh

You lift my feet off the ground  
You spin me around  
You make me crazier, crazier  
Feels like I'm fallin' and I am lost in your eyes  
You make me crazier, crazier, crazier  
Crazier, crazier, crazier

I wrote it all down in my notebook right then the bell rang it made me jump Edward would've been laughing his head off if he saw that. As he said he was waiting for me.

"Were you okay in class you seem out of it?"

"oh ya I just had a lot on my mind and I wrote a song!!!!" I wondered if I should sing it for him or not. I peeked at him throw the corner of my eye. He smiled slightly at least it was better than before.

"Really that's great." He never even asked to hear it. SOOOOOO unlike him.

"ya." I said with a frown. We got our food and sat down but for the first time in a long time we sat alone not even jasper or Alice sat by us. It was silent for so long I couldn't take stand it any longer. I got up not even bothering to grab my stuff. I just ran. Ran out of the school and across the street. Into the forest. I ran faster and faster not caring if he was fallowing. I ran till I got to a place I didn't know. I felt his presence behind me still in the trees.

"Tell me and tell me NOW!" I demanded not turning to face him.

"I-I-I-." I turn I must admit I was pissed off.

"Edward!!" he took in my expression and took in a deep breath.

"Bella I have to go back."What go back where?

"What? I don't understand. Go where?"

"I've told you that inn my pass I did something in my past that had a consequence right?"

"Ya???" I had no idea where this was going. I sat down on a bench that happened to be in the middle of nowhere. Weird.

"the thing is…" he passed back and forth." I have to back and fight in the war. Thing in my pass is I was a tough guy so Carlisle sent me off knowing I couldn't get hurt and hoping it would change my behavior." _He has to go fight in the war but he was coming back. Okay I can deal with this I hope. I have to be strong for me._

"H-H-H-." I took a deep breath needing him here beside me but he wasn't he was 5 feet away from me."How long? How long will you be gone?"

"12 months." He said a year he would be gone a whole year." But I'll get to visit once maybe twice in-between." Okay so one maybe two visits. I'll miss him more than anything.

"when do you leave?"

"two months." He took out a letter from his jacket pocket and gave it to me. Sure enough it was a letter from the army.

**Tell me what your thoughts are.=)**


	5. I Can Do This

**I Can Do This**

Okay Bella you can do this just suck it up and deal with it Edward needs you to be strong so strong you will be.

"Bella?" Edward asked," Bella…..?" Edward asked one more time before grabbing a hold of my shoulders, gently, and shaking me.

"I'm Fine." I said a little robotically." It's just a lot to comprehend in one sitting."

"I know I know, Love and I'm sorry I-." he paused," I should have told you sooner I was just so worried about leaving you that I couldn't think straight."

"I know. It's alright Edward; it's fine that you waited."I tried to sound mature, but inside I was freaking out," We should go back to school, now."

"No why don't we ditch." He said quietly.

"We can't do that we have school to attend." He grabbed my arm and slung me onto his back.

"Nah babe we're going to your dream place." And he kissed my hand that was lying on top of my other hand that was laying limb on his chest.

"Fine."I kissed the side of his neck, but really I was just as excited as he." Someone's a little eager."

"I'm always eager to spend time with you."

With that he took off running; through the forest as fast as he possibly could. He never stopped but would hum every time I would kiss his cheek or the side of his neck. Man, I would miss him. I don't know how I could live without him, but I **will**. I have to; for him. For him I would do anything, all he had to do was ask. For pout, also use that crooked smile that he knows I can't resist.

"Were you to busy thinking about me that you didn't realize that we are here." He said all cocky. DANG(!) he was gorges. He grabbed me arms and swung me around him so he had his arms around my waist and I was hovering above the ground.

"YES yes I was." I lend forward and stool a kiss, but this time on the lips. His yummy, yummy lips. I still couldn't put a flavor to those lips of his so I made up a new one and called it Edward, great name, right?

"I've been thinking about you to." He kissed me this time. We were just giving chaste kiss to each other.

"Really?" I love this Edward.

"Oh ya. My every thought you are the center of. Also every day dream." He then proceeded to sit us on the grass below us, and kiss my nose, my right cheek, my cheek, my forehead and both my ears.(which made me giggle((LIKE A GIRL(!))).

"Well you are the center of both of those and also my dreams. So I think I win!" I kissed him everywhere he kissed me. (He chuckled((it was kind of HOT)).

"Okay okay you win. Well, Miss. Swan I believe you have a song to sing me."I gave him a questioning look. What is he talking about?"Ha-ha. You forgot about the song you wrote today in class?" THAT ONE! I jump up, got my guitar and was back before he stopped laughing at my sudden outburst.

"It's called Crazier."

Crazier:  


I've never gone with the wind  
Just let it flow  
Let it take me where it wants to go  
Till you open the door  
There's so much more  
I've never seen it before

I was trying to fly  
But I couldn't find wings  
Then you came along  
And you changed everything

You lift my feet off the ground  
Spin me around  
You make me crazier, crazier  
Feels like I'm falling and I  
I'm lost in your eyes  
You make me crazier,  
Crazier, crazier

Watched from a distance as you  
Made life your own  
Every sky was your own kind of blue  
And I wanted to know  
How that would feel  
And you made it so real

You showed me something that I couldn't see  
Opened my eyes and you made me believe

You lift my feet off the ground  
Spin me around  
You make me crazier, crazier  
Feels like I'm falling and I  
I'm lost in your eyes  
You make me crazier,  
Crazier, crazier, oh

Baby, you showed me what living is for  
I don't want to hide anymore

You lift my feet off the ground  
You spin me around  
You make me crazier, crazier  
Feels like I'm falling and I  
I'm lost in your eyes  
You make me crazier,  
Crazier, crazier  
Crazier, crazier

He looked up at me from under his eye lashes and before I knew it my guitar was out of my hands and on the floor and he was lying on me. He kissed passionately once then started me deeply in the eyes. " That was beautiful, Love." He then flipped us so I was on top I giggled like a school girl, AGAIN.

"Thank you." We stayed like that for a long time. Two things I was sure of: 1) He was SO good at distracting me from my problems. And 2) I would miss him more than anything.


End file.
